My Top 10 Beauties

Earlier this week Ms. Blue Eyes and I had a fun conversation about our top 10 beauties. I think that her criteria was much more nuanced and deeply-considered than mine, but I am a man, and when it comes to pretty women and prettiness, in general, we tend to be simple.

My thinking was that in choosing my top 10, my list must consist of the women who have occupied the most time in my mind, and that typically comes from TV, music, movies, and even discussions. For some of them, I have collected magazines with them on the cover, and I've even kept some of those magazines over the years. Since this is a list of "beauties," my list does not take into consideration their professional achievements, or artistic ability. There is no requirement for them to be particularly interesting or bright, and indeed, I would not want to have dinner with any of them. Well, except for one of them. So, in no particular order, I present you my top 10:

Farah Fawcett

I first saw Charlie's Angels in 1980, and amidst the three "angels," I Farah Fawcett was the one that stuck out to me. It's no secret why; it was the blonde hair. At this point, I'd noticed that blonde girls held a special attraction to me: Loni Anderson, Cherly Ladd, Blondie, Judy Landers, Bo Derek, Suzanne Somers...I found all of them to be extremely attractive, but what put Farah Fawcett on this list (over those blondes who didn't make it) was...the poster. I remember seeing that poster and wanting it so bad, but I was a young pre-pubescent boy in a Baptist household and that just wasn't going to happen. I didn't pay much attention to Farah after Charlie's Angels was over, but she was one of my first standards of beauty, and for that reason, she has to be on this list. Hey, now that I'm an adult, I should buy that famous swimsuit poster, shouldn't I?

Donna Summer

I remember watching Donna Summer dance on TV. She was so vibrant and she moved in the sexiest way. She didn't move far from her original position, but she moved so much, her head going side to side, her hips swinging loosely and her shoulder dipping and rising so fluidly! She was amazing to watch and I'm sure that my dad thought the same thing.

My dad had the 45 to her son "Last Dance," and late at night in my bedroom closet, I'd play it repeatedly on my little record player. Her song "Love To Love You," was by far my favorite, and I'd listen to all 16 minutes of that one. The way she sweetly-whispered those few, simple (and I now know, weak) lyrics and the orgasmic moaning that came between those sparse lyrics...wow! It rocked my little boy-brain and was such a turn-on for me, though I didn't yet know that's what it was. Oh, I just added that song (the short version) to the L.A. playlist.

Cindy Crawford

I was in college when the supermodel phase was in full-swing and one of the ones at the top was Cincy Crawford. Had I not come of age then, she would not be on my list, but timing is everything, right? Even now I vividly remember her bathtub scene in George Michael's "Freedom '90" video. I don't think that she was the prettiest supermodel (Turlington, Campbell and Evangelista all have her beat), but she is the one that I latched on to the most and that's probably because she was so heavily-marketed on a daily basis. And of course, she was quite pretty, as well.

Marilyn Monroe has to be on everyone's list. Well, anyone who has even the slightest understanding of history, any way. I didn't become smitten with her until I was well into my twenties, but when I discovered who (and why) she was, I decided that she was one of the all-time beauties. At one point, I had several books on her, but now I am only down to two, and one of them is nothing but pictures.

Marilyn Monroe

Naomi Campbell

Naomi Campbell entered my life at the same she entered most people's minds: in the early 90s during the supermodel heyday. Truthfully, I always felt a little bad for her because she knew that she was very much so the token (but fortunate) black girl, but I also think that she was every bit the equal of her supermodel counterparts and excelled in some ways; certainly none of them walked the catwalk with the force and presence, and I don't think that any of them had a more perfectly-proportioned face. Earlier, I mentioned George Michael's Freedom '90 video and early in it, a door opens and Naomi Campbell appears dancing and twirling about in perfect time with headphones on her head. She moved so perfectly, and the director was genius to show her dancing throughout the video.

Angelina Jolie

I watched Girl Interrupted in 2000, while on a U.S. Navy warship. We were making the journey across the Atlantic and one of the lieutenants had gotten a hold of the VHS tape. That was my introduction to Angelina Jolie. There are some celebrities who get too much credit for being pretty, but in Jolie's case, it is all warranted. She has such interesting and bold features and what is amazing about her is that it all works, despite the fact that it shouldn't! Those lips, and that jaw line, and those cheekbones, and that forehead just don't go together! Except that they do and in doing so, make her truly an original.

While we were on that Navy ship, we docked in Italy, and I picked up a copy of Italian Vogue, solely because it featured Jolie on the cover. Twenty-three years later, I still have that magazine packed away in a plastic container somewhere.

Blondie

Ahh, Blondie! I first heard her music in 1980 while dancing to Heart Of Glass, at the local roller rink. It was such a high-energy song and I also loved the next single off that album, The Tide Is High, and Call Me. I didn't know what she looked like at that point though, until I saw the video for Rapture! My, she took my breath away with her energy and the way she led that band and confidently danced her way through that glorious video. Adding to her appeal was that I had just discovered hip-hop, and this video had both rapping and a graffiti artist! She was probably the most fascinating white women I knew of at that point.

Tyra Banks

Tyra is similar to Cindy Crawford, in that she features so highly on my list due to her commercial success and presence in the media. I remember when she was featured on the cover of Sports Illustrated Swimsuit edition the first time (with a less-offensive white model) and then again the second time, when America decided that it was ok. I still have that second magazine somewhere, along with the GQ magazine, in which she was the cover girl. Unlike Naomi Campbell, Tyra was much more approachable and down-to-earth, and even Oprah liked her. I watched her guest appearance on The Fresh Prince of Belair and thought she put on serviceable performances in the movies, Higher Learning and also in Love and Basketball. She was everywhere in the 1990s, and that's why she makes my list. Incidentally, I never thought she was beautiful, but her body was unusual for a top model of that time, and her thighs were just ridiculous.

Chrissy (aka, Suzanne Somers) radiated ludicrous amounts of sex back in the late 70s and early-80s, and my young self took note. While other attractive women caught my attention due to having a pretty face or blonde hair, when it came to Chrissy, it was everything! I used to watch Threes Company, hoping and praying that she'd come out in some skimpy shorts or workout attire or even a bathing suit, so that I could get a glimpse of her body. She was the first woman that I lusted for, though I didn't realize that until I started putting this post together. Like Farah Fawcett, Blondie, and Donna Summer, she's on this list because she shaped my taste in women, starting at a young age, and judging by the next woman on the list, Chrissy's mark on me has an effect on me to this day...

Suzanne Somers

The Prettiest Girl

As I mentioned in the beginning, these pictures aren't in any particular order, but I have saved the top pick for last. In all of my life, there has not been a woman who has been the cause of so much of my brain's activity as this woman. Since I first saw her, I have been smitten by how attractive and pretty she is, and indeed, when I first caught my first glimpse of her, I gasped and turned my head out of shock that any mortal can be so perfect. Her face, her body (all six feet of of it), her thighs, her feet...every inch of her, really, has fascinated and thrilled me to no end these past several years, and there seems to be no end in sight. I have photographed her thousands of times, and spent countless hours writing about her in an attempt to capture all that prettiness in words. It is impossible, by the way. If you totaled up the total time I spent watching the previous nine women, that time would not equal 1/1000th of the total time that I have spent watching, thinking and contemplating this girl. Ms. Blue Eyes will go down as the greatest, most impactful, and most significant beauty of my life.